Hello, my name is Scott and I am trying to relive past glory that never happened by playing softball despite being in great pain.
I'm an idiot for playing. Here's why:
I'm out of shape.
I have a bone spur that has grown into my Achilles' tendon which causes the tendon to have limited flexibility.
I have a herniated disc in my lower back which causes ME to have limited flexibility.
I'm out of shape.
During the game, I am fine. My body has generally loosened up enough to move without piercing pain.
The next morning, however, is a different story.
It's hard to get out of bed. It's hard to walk once I do get out of bed. It generally hurts to move for the rest of the day.
I'm an idiot to do this to myself.
But play on I do. I can't help it. I love baseball/softball. I'm the coach of the company team, and we're pretty good. The competition is good. The comraderie is great. The idea of it all is wonderful.
The after-effects are wretched.
My wife supports my softball habit, though I suspect she wonders why I do this to myself. But she supports me nonetheless, and I love her for that. When she and my daughters come to the games, they cheer me on and that does wonders for the psyche. At that moment, it makes it seem so worthwhile.
I suppose that every addiction has that moment. The heroin slipping into the bloodstream. The buzz of being numb after that bottle of Jack. The buzz is the catch. It's the reason why.
I don't think there's a support program for my addiction, however. And anyways, I don't think I could walk up those 12 steps.
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